Courage. I sometimes have to muster up the courage to say things. I have a difficult conversation coming soon and I've finally decided I can do this. I might cry, but nobody will die and it will all be fine in the end. I think. It is with great trepidation that I need to tell someone that I can no longer help in the way I've been helping for so many years. I know I will be letter that person down as well as the group of people this decision affects. I'm torn but I'm also tattered. Sometimes it's good to take care of ourselves and although we feel we are disappointing others, it's better in the long run because we can recharge our batteries and come back refreshed later on. This is me trying to convince myself it's all going to be ok. Sigh.
I hate letting people down--or even feeling like I'm letting people down. Most of all, I hate letting myself down and in this particular situation, I feel that no matter what I do, I'm letting myself down. If I continue, I let myself down by doing too much. If I stop, I let myself down because I feel like a failure. Why can't it just be easy? Why am I so sensitive? Ack.
I will have courage. I will do this. I'll let you know how it turns out.